I’m sure you have some strong points and nice things about you, and there are areas in your life where you feel you are a worthwhile person to be around. These qualities are very positive. But you also have some weak and nasty traits that Paul calls “carnal.” Concentrating on correcting the weak areas in your life is what will keep you emotionally healthy and able to move forward in your relationships.

Paul identifies some of these weak points as he continues to address his friends in 1 Corinthians 3:3, “For whereas there is among you envying, and strife, and divisions, are ye not carnal?”

How about you? Is there envy in your heart? If so, you will feel disturbed, annoyed, and/or upset over somebody else’s qualities and opportunities. As well, strife and division will affect you in the same way and will bring with them wrangling, disagreements, arguments, and contentions.

Could we be talking about “attitude” here? Your attitude is something only you can choose to change. You must make the choice on how to respond to individuals who upset you. Since your attitude is determined by your spirit, if your spirit is carnal, there will need to be changes. That change can only come through the fruit of the Spirit of God as defined in Galatians 5:22-23 (KJV).

“The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance.”

Now that’s good news, for it brings the solution to the carnal spirit. But you must be willing to make the adjustments connected with the fruit of the Spirit. You can only do that through God, as He is the one who gives you these qualities, and they are yours for the asking.

Having the spirit of longsuffering will enable you to keep working on your weak points as long as necessary to deal with the divisive spirit called carnality. As an added bonus you will find your response to others beginning to change because the joy of the Lord lives in your heart. Rather than responding with those nasty traits of your carnal spirit, you will respond happily, joyfully, and peacefully, remembering your peace doesn’t depend on whether someone or some circumstances are difficult. It depends on the fruit of the Spirit that lives within you. Your attitude will then be one of love, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness and self-control.

Knowing now what is carnal and what is spiritual, you have the opportunity to ”locate yourself.” Are you carnal or are you spiritual?

Take a step . . .
Identify the carnal spirit that keeps you from effectively relating yourself to other people. Ask God to fill you with His Spirit and to give you the qualities that will enable you to effectively relate to people in a new way. Choose to let go of your “carnal” behavior.

This summary is from Dr. Brandt’s message, Locate Yourself.

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You might identify with this couple’s statement because you’re feeling, “If I could only get out of the situation I’m in, that would do it for me. I could be happy. I could do the Lord’s work. I could love other people.”

But the truth of the matter is: God is with us in every situation, and He is with us right where we are! What we need to discover is how to respond appropriately to our current circumstances. You can either have a wonderful time underneath your skin, or a miserable time underneath your skin, and it’s all up to you. The question is: Do you want to experience true peace, or are you more content with being angry, with bearing a grudge, with complaining, with being cranky? The answer to that question requires some personal reflection!

Jesus has offered us a solution to responding to our difficult situations! In Matthew 11:28, He calls us to “Come unto me all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn of Me. I am gentle and humble in My heart, and you will find rest for your soul.”

“Come unto Me . . .” Not come with me to the golf course or the gym. Not come and engage with me in a class or some form of recreation. Not “just get busy” with me as we take on planning a party, or a trip or a church event. “Come unto Me!” True contentment and peace is found in HIM!

John 14:27 tells us, “Peace I leave with you. My peace I give unto you. Not as the world gives.” “Not as the world gives” is an important point. There are two kinds of peace: the world’s kind and the Lord’s kind. And it’s important to know the difference between the two. The world’s kind of peace offers exercise and all kinds of facilities where you can work off your tensions and find relaxation. To get your mind off yourself, there are books, radio, TV, and hobbies. And there are fun things to occupy your time, as well as all kinds of relaxation courses and exercises. All these “outlets” can keep you occupied for years, but they ultimately only offer the world’s peace.

The Lord’s kind of peace is a peace that gets into your soul. In John 16:33, Jesus says “These things have I spoken unto you that IN ME you should have peace. In the world you’ll have trouble, but I have overcome the world” [emphasis added]. Jesus is talking about an untroubled heart in a troubled world. Isn’t that what you’re looking for?

God is just waiting to give you that peace. He’s waiting for you to ask Him to give you that peace, to open up your life to Him. Allow Him to change you, and challenge you, and transform your inner reactions to life’s situations.

Read Matthew 11:28, John 14:27, and John 16:33.

Take a step . . .

Find a little time to evaluate your reactions to your current situations.

What is keeping you from experiencing God’s love, joy, and peace?

Are you willing to yield yourself to the Lord?

Are you willing to release the emotions to Him that are affecting your life in a negative way?

Do you truly desire His peace?

Ask God to fill you with His peace and to show you how you can change.

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When you speak or act in a way that you know in your heart to be wrong, you pay with your emotions. You chip away at your own self-respect. But one of the most important principles that you can apply to your life is that your mental health is in your control. YOU are the one who must CHOOSE how to respond to individuals and situations in your life that are less than perfect.

You might say, “If only this person would change, then all these wonderfully warm friendly qualities would be released in me.” Not so. Nobody can cause you to be angry, stubborn, immovable, inflexible, and easily irritable. Your behavior is determined by your spirit, and your spirit involves you and God. It’s a unique relationship. It has nothing to do with anyone else.

Romans 13:1-2 says “Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers for there is no power but of God and the powers that are ordained of God. Whosoever therefore resists the power resists the ordinance of God, and they that resist shall receive unto themselves damnation” (KJV). The NIV puts it in a gentler way:  “will bring judgment on themselves.” You see, your behavior makes a difference to you.

Don’t allow yourself to drift away from allowing the Lord to fill your heart with His Spirit day by day. Nobody can stop you from calling on God to fill you with His love, joy, peace, gentleness, kindness, and patience. Do what you’re doing and saying in His Name, as though He were right there with you. Let Him help you feel the relief of walking through life with a thankful spirit.

Philippians 2:2-4 tells us to “let nothing be done through strife or vain glory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem the other better than themselves” (KJV).

Becoming preoccupied with the negative qualities of anyone or anything in your life causes you to lose sight of good things. The Creator of the universe laid down His life for you. He has chosen to put the emphasis on your spiritual life. He has chosen to give you of His Spirit, and to make your burden light. He gives you the ability to honor him in all that you do and say.

Take a step . . .
Are you presently holding on to a heavy burden? Open your heart to God’s Spirit and let Him fill your life with joy, peace, love, kindness, and gentleness. Take a moment to pray this prayer:

Lord, help me to be conscious of the fact that You have something to say about the way I interact with people and situations in my life. Help me to be more aware of my response to the tasks that are given to me and how I interact with people. Today I choose to commit what I do and say to You, looking to You for that spirit of joy that you died to give me, doing it in Your Name. Help me to remember I do this with You by my side. In Jesus Name, I pray. Amen.

Read Colossians 3:17, Romans 13:1-2, and Philippians 2:2-4.

This is a summary of Dr. Brandt’s message Biblical Behavior.

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Maybe you struggle with some of these emotions, feeling you have a right to them because of how you’ve been treated. But Ephesians goes on to say, “Be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake has forgiven you.”

Now being kind and forgiving someone is extremely difficult when your feelings aren’t so loving! However, at some point, even though you may not want to, you decide to try to love the one who has mistreated you. To your surprise, you discover that it doesn’t work! You can control what you say, the way you look at them, and the way you behave, but you can’t control your feelings. Why is that?

2 Corinthians 3:5-6 gives us an answer: “Not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think any thing as of ourselves; but our sufficiency is of God; Who also hath made us able ministers of the new testament; not of the letter, but of the Spirit, for the letter killeth, but the Spirit giveth life.” So yes, you can possibly control your behavior, and the way you talk, but you can’t control your spirit. The Christian life isn’t a matter of self-improvement, or will power, or determination, it’s a matter of a changed heart, and only God can change your heart!

Ask God to change your heart!

Take a step . . .
Ask God in prayer to show you the real condition of your heart. Admit to Him your wrong emotions, desires, and selfishness. Tell Him you’re sorry and ask Him to forgive and cleanse you. Ask Him to help you to submit to Him and to fill your heart with kindness, tenderheartedness, forgiveness, and love.

This summary is from Dr. Brandt’s message entitled Marriage.

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The mind is the most private part of your inner life. No one can know for sure what you allow to enter into it, and no one can know what goes on in your mind unless you reveal it. The longer I work with people, the more convinced I become that everyone can and does control his mind. We make our own decisions, and no one can change them. Everyone has the power of choice.

It’s important to remember that we can’t always determine someone’s inner life based upon their words or behavior. The Bible puts it clearly:

For as he thinks within himself, so he is. He says to you, ”Eat and drink!” but his head is not with you (Proverbs 23:7).

You are constantly exchanging ideas with partners, parents, relatives, friends, teachers, preachers and others. We are all familiar with the flood of ideas coming at us from the radio, TV, newspapers, books, magazines, pamphlets, movies, billboards, and advertisements.

What will you do with this mass of information that bids for your attention? Remember, it’s your attention. It’s your mind. There is no avoiding your responsibility.

You need a standard to go by. The Bible says:

”My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways,” declares the Lord (Isaiah 55:8).

Since our thoughts are not His thoughts, nor our ways His ways, we need to make a conscious, deliberate effort to know Him. We must fill our head with God’s commandments in order to think straight–to develop a basis for keeping acceptable ideas and filtering out the unacceptable ones.

King David, a man after God’s own heart, said of God’s laws:

The law of the LORD is perfect, restoring the soul; the testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple. The precepts of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart; the commandment of the Lord is pure, enlightening the eyes. The fear of the LORD is clean, enduring forever; the judgments of the LORD are true; they are righteous altogether. They are more desirable than gold, yes than much fine gold (Psalm 19:7-10).

If you cry for discernment, lift your voice for understanding: lf you seek her as silver, and search for her as for hidden treasures; then you will discern the fear of the Lord, and discover the knowledge of God (Proverbs 2:3-5).

This is no simple path to follow. The management of your mind is a daily task. It involves continuous study, and no one can do it for you. Every day of your life, you are called upon to make decisions, and you must respond to decisions other people make that affect you. Some decisions facing you are how to respond to tragedy, death, or some event beyond your control.

This whole area of decision-making is a common subject in the consulting room. Most of my clients who bring up this subject are anxious about a decision to be made or are disturbed and angry over the outcome of a decision or event that has already occurred, whether my client participated in it or was only affected by it.

Following are some Bible verses that have proven useful in managing the mental activity involved in decision making:

Delight yourself in the LORD; and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit  your way to the LORD, trust also in Him, and He will do it. And He will bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your judgment as the noonday. Rest in the LORD and wait patiently for Him; fret not yourself because of him who prospers in his way, because of the man who carries out wicked schemes (Psalm 37:4-7).

Commit your works to the LORD, and your plans will be established (Proverbs 16:3).

And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28).

The emphasis in these verses is not on the outcome of the decisions, but on the attitude of the decision maker:

• Delight yourself in the Lord.
• Commit your way to the Lord.
• Trust in Him.
• Rest in the Lord.
• Wait patiently for Him.
• Fret not yourself.
• God causes all things to work together for good for those who love Him.

There will be happy times, crisis times, even tragic times. Let me emphasize that these verses stress the attitude of the decision maker rather than evaluation of the immediate outcome of a decision or an event. It takes months or even years to see how all things work together.

The Bible verses in this chapter have been assembled with an emphasis on the management of your mind. You can choose what will linger there. You can have a depraved mind–or a wholesome mind. If you seek to please God with the use of your mind, you will be able to describe yourself as did the prophet Jeremiah:

Thus says the LORD, “Let not a wise man boast of his wisdom, and let not the mighty man boast of his might, let not a rich man boast of his riches; but let him who boasts boast of this, that he understands and knows Me, that I am the LORD who exercises lovingkindness, justice, and righteousness on earth; for I delight in these things,” declares the LORD (Jeremiah 9:23-24).

Take to heart some classic advice from the apostle Paul on the management of your mind:

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, shall guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, let your mind dwell on these things (Philippians 4:6-8).

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This is an excerpt of chapter 8 from Dr. Brandt’s book, I Want Happiness Now!