Life Discipleship Resources from Dr. Henry Brandt
What do you think is involved in being an effective parent?
The Bible tells us in Proverbs 22:6 to “Train up a child in the way he should go; and when he is old, he will not depart from it” (KJV).
Now that’s a tall order, and a great responsibility, and there are some positive ingredients that make that possible.
The use of words is the most common subject that comes up in my consulting room. This is a difficult subject to write about, because words get tangled up with the emotions as well as with a person’s mental activity.
With words, we compliment and praise one another. Our words can be comforting, helpful, supportive, instructive–revealing all those good things that are on our minds.
On the other hand, words can cut, hurt, or tear someone up without leaving a mark. Words can be used to deceive, mislead, or conceal what is on your mind.
A line of research concerning a group of young people called “indestructibles” was once reported in a leading psychological journal.
These indestructibles lived under extreme poverty, and came from very bad home conditions that were located in slum neighborhoods. Yet, they were well-adjusted and good students.
That research got me to thinking of some people I’ve met in my life who fit the description of “indestructibles.”
It is true that we cannot prevent troublesome or sorrowful events from intruding into our lives. But some people live heartily, joyfully and considerately one day at a time. They rely on their power of choice, whether their problems are solved today or not.
How does your relationship with your marriage partner compare with the following standard? “I appeal to you, dear brothers and sisters, by the authority of our Lord Jesus Christ, to live in harmony with each other. Let there be no divisions in the church. Rather, be of one mind, united in thought and purpose.” 1 Corinthians 1:10 (NLTSE)
That scripture’s standard doesn’t leave much leeway, does it? There’s little room for individuality or for you to do your own thing. But those who proceed into marriage with an individualistic mindset create disharmony in their relationship, and usually end up lonely and unhappy.
What do you believe is the basis for building an effective relationship involving two or more people? 1 Corinthians 1:10 gives the answer. “I beseech you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that ye all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you; but that ye be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment” (KJV).
That’s a picture of two people whose hearts are set on similar things, their minds work together, their plans are the same, and their objectives are the same. That’s cooperation, and that’s how marriage should work.